Flasher Cash: 2011

I`m building a subway from my bedroom to the kitchen cause I`m tired of driving the golf cart around the cabin late at night.

I spoke to Siemens and the fastest subway they got is a joke. If it wasn`t for the runway would pass my kitchen I would have built airports. God dammit, I don`t have time to wait for public transport.

Foto ivva

I need more space. Give me the president on the line. I want to buy the moon.

Tell him to put it on my tax. Call NASA and arrange transport. Tell them I want a window seat with leg room and no in-space movies. I want samba dancers!

Photo lrargerich

I never cared about golf until Tiger got caught, then I thought, this is the sport for me

When you can screw around as long as he did without having your wife leaving you, then marriage might be something for me after all. Can you imagine coming home to a knockout like her after cheating? I just have to remember the prenup cause I don`t want to cheat on to the same bombshell for the rest of my life. 6-7 divorces should be acceptable without hurting my business... it`s probably probably expected... I`m 20 something and not divorced once. I got to get married now!

Foto Keith Allison

I sleept for 3 weeks

So I sent one of my assistants out to take some pictures for my blog. Ignore I`m sleeping and pretend it`s me. Who cares. I`ve seen it a hundred times on tv anyway.

I need to hire a writer to put some blah blah here. I don`t know what to write. Rich and poor side by side... That`s how my life is wherever I go. Everybody is poorer than me so. Probably why I like India. Feels like home.

Gotta bring my personal assistant here.

Yuk. Thank god I lack sympathy. Otherwise I would have to help these people.

My alarm clock. My plane is leaving in 30 min. It`s about time to get up.

Photo Christian Haugen / Deivis / idreamofdaylight / Nir Nussbaum / mckaysavage

I want more sexual harassment in my workplace

This is how I`m going to achieve it. Every woman over 40, wait 45, loose their jobs and every guy hotter than me gets killed. Those remaining will be separated in two groups. Outside office and inside. The men goes outside, off course. And the lucky left will get the opportunity to earn great bonuses on the strength of their performances. Who said hard work didn`t pay off:)

Photo xamad

Berlusconi, my idol

He`s 74 and banging women like a hot dog. Not even the court system can bring this guy to justice. That`s how I want to be when I retire.

Photo Alessio85

Daddy likes Cayman Island

Now we`re talking.

Do not feed the locals, he he.

Forgot to empty my pockets.

My Cayman Office.

Business meeting.

Photo javajoba/kafka4prez / bsabarnowl / Incase.

Should I go to Tahiti or just chill?

I`m flying over anyway so I might aswell go there and tick it of on my been there done that map. I`ll just stay in the plane anyway. There`s nothing in Tahiti I haven`t done already, besides I`m tired after last night in Rio.

Photo tiarescott

Which politician should I buy?

I need some permits and I need to not be investigated for a few things so preferably one with a few cops in his pocket. Anybody got recommendations or know off someone for sale? Let me know, you will be rewarded.

Photo mennswear

I have to quit smoking

It`s a deadly hobby. Every time I fire up one someone dies. Sooner or later it will catch up with me.

Photo The Knowles Gallery

Come over to the dark side

I`m hiring. I need a new hit squad. A group of ex-milliary , ex-CIA, ex-whatever to fix a few things for me when business partners don`t do as I say. The pay is beyond great, all expenses covered, included unlimited pussy buffets. Send your resume to henchmen.doasIsayor@someonegetsit.com and we`ll contact you.

Photo Klearchos Kapoutsis Santorini

I made 6 billion $ at the stock market today. I`m gonna f@#ing explode!!!

Ugh! Ugh! I`m them man, ugh! Yeah baby, come to daddy. Playa! Suck my $$$$. Give it to me now. UGH! YES!!! I`m the king, bitch! Suck my toe, do it. Come on, do it. Suck it, suck it real good.

Photo denvie balidoy

The release party for my new pants

Playa!

Tried to get inn.

Photo Vark1, Photo Abeeeer, Photo Philip Nelson

I want to buy this area and paint it green

I think thats a good idea. I know an interior decorator who can help me. Then we can call it art or something. Put Miami on the cultural map with a street art exhibition.

I`m such a gifted guy. My ideas are so great I surprise myself sometimes by how great I am. Like I`m God and it`s my destiny to enlighten human kind in high art. Earth is lucky to have me at their surface.

Photo amichan83

Took a trip to the Hamptons today

The ship was heading to the Caribbean, but hey, it`s my yacht. I own this motherf@#ker. You do as I say. There where a few hundred passengers from abroad who got angry. Luckily I didn`t have to deal with them cause I never hired anyone in the complaint department.

Anyway, half way to the Hamptons I got bored and went to the Caribbean instead.

Photo roger4336

This is my monkey

He has a brain the size of my last girlfriend. I call him Jane 2. I name all my monkeys after previous girlfriends. They hate it when name a current one. Yeah, they get really upset. But not enough to not leave my money. I got a lot of money. He he.

Photo New Jersey Birds

Should I buy a partyscraper?

Should I? Or should I give the money to the Salvation Army? Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Had you there for a second. Salvation Army... Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! No, that`s only when there`s press around. Jesus Christ. Should I invest in weapons or the good word of the lord? HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! Motherfucker. "I`ll sell all my stocks in the booze market and give it to charity". HA!!! HA!!! HA!!! I`m killing myself. Ha ha ha. Oh my god. I need a drink.

Photo emilio labrador

I got to get myself one of those

I`m tired of taking the limo. I need some change. Obama, I gave you my vote, now it`s your turn to give me my tram.

Photo humbertomoreno

I drove down those palm trees with my Humvee last night

I got the military edition. I don`t know what I was thinking, probably nothing cause I was drinking. But it really do get out of hand sometimes. Thank God nobody important got killed.

Photo Sebastian01071979

I need a bigger summerplace

How am I gonna build an indoor golf course in this little tiny mini mansion when I can barely fit a helicopter on the roof?! I need more space! Either that or I`ll build it underwater.

Photo Henrik Jagels

Memories

I got a 700.000 AUD dollar ticket for parking the plane next to the opera house and then an additional 1.2 million for landing in the Sidney harbor. God those guys where uptight. Didn`t wanna sell it either.

Photo budgetplaces.com

This is where I wash money, get fake passports or whatever the hell I need

It`s a great place. They take care of everything. The only thing they don`t do is car insurance.

Photo eschipul

Ready for pizza and airplane?

Anybody want a to join to the 10.000 ft club? Send a voicemail with your stats and my driver picks up the lucky winners.

Photo Altair78

I blew 6 thousand dollars last night. It makes me so horny

I think it was in Sao Paulo. I can`t remember. Time flies.

Anyway. It takes a lot of cash to be a man. The more cash you got the more man you are and I`m f@#king superman. I got so much dough I could build an empire up my ass. I can buy every factory in China, move them to Gibraltar just to make them say it`s made in Gibraltar.

Photo Marcosleal